Chelsea Clinton Caused a Massacre and I’m Offended

I can’t figure out which party or class of people I am supposed to be offended on behalf of any longer or exactly whom committed the offense to start with. I just know that I am offended.

I demand an apology from…someone!

Let’s get to the bottom of this so that we can clearly state how we are offended.

As previously stated, Ilhan Omar did not tweet an anti-Semitic statement, but we’re going to run with that anyway, because we need to take offense and demand redress on behalf of some other party.

Follow the trail of offenses:

Glenn Greenwald, journalist from “The Intercept” responds to a Kevin McCarthy statement:

Ilhan Omar interjects with an obscure comment to Glenn Greenwald’s tweet:

Which causes worldwide condemnation because it is somehow anti-Semitic, when it isn’t.

Forward Opinion editor Batya Ungar-Sargon takes offense at Omar’s tweet and on behalf of all American Jews, makes the following tweet:

Chelsea Clinton, sensing that a movement is afoot, jumps into the fray with her enthusiastic support in being similarly offended on behalf of a class of people of which she is not a part, declaring she is offended as “an American” and therefore representative of that class:

Now at this point there’s a whole side conversation in which Omar and Clinton have some meeting of the mind, playing out this charade like automatons at stalemate.

But let’s not get distracted by what should be the end of the story. Remember, we need to be offended. To bring us up to date on how and why we should be offended:

We should be offended, as an American, in support of someone who purports to speak for all American Jews, that Ilhan Omar’s obscure statement in agreeance with Greewald’s questioning the motivation of US Political leaders, in the person of Sen. McCarthy, is actually an anti-Semitic statement, which it isn’t.

But wait, there is more for us to consider:

Because Chelsea Clinton casually supported Betya Ungar-Sargon statement without standing, she is responsible for the massacre of 49 people in New Zealand, as proven in this viral moment of confrontation. Student Leen Dweik is the one caught in the video confronting Clinton about her idle support of a topic where her opinion isn’t desired or warranted.

Ho HO!

Now in a twitter series, the masses are offended by Leen Dweik’s comment on behalf of Muslims, that Clinton is responsible for a mass murder and are taking to the proverbial streets (in twitter) to protest her unreasonable connection between Clinton’s idle statement and an unrelated horrific event.

Dweik’s current position is that she didn’t say Clinton was responsible, even though she said exactly that, and was merely pointing out that idle statements in defense of Jews, and “jumping on the bandwagon”, is actually Islamophobia and should be condemned.

So how should we feel offended now?

Finally, our offense can be stated without any further clarification:

We are hereby offended, possibly in defense of Muslims, by idle statements that directly or indirectly lead to massacres, from any party in connection to the offense we feel, as an American, in support of someone who purports to speak for all American Jews, that Ilhan Omar’s obscure statement in agreeance with Greewald’s questioning the motivation of US Political leaders, in the person of Sen. McCarthy, is actually an anti-Semitic statement, which it isn’t.

I’m wondering how Greenwald walked out of this unscathed. He started all this shit. As a matter of fact, I’m offended. It’s probably because he’s a white dude.

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